Sunday, April 30, 2006
Thursday, April 27, 2006
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
Just keeping you "in the loop" so you'll know what's going on:
RED FRIDAYS ----- Very soon, you will see a great many people
wearing Red every Friday. The reason? Canadians who support our
troops used to be called the "silent majority". We are no longer silent, and
are voicing our love for God, country and home in record-breaking
numbers. We are not organized, boisterous or over-bearing. We get no
liberal media coverage on TV to reflect our message or our opinions.
Many Canadians, like you, me and all our friends, simply want to
recognize that the vast majority of Canadians do support our troops.
Our idea of showing solidarity and support for our troops with dignity
and respect starts this Friday -and continues each and every Friday
until all the troops come home. This sends a deafening message that
every red-blooded Canadian, who supports our men and women afar will
wear something red. By word of mouth, press, TV -- let's make Canada a sea
every one of us who loves this country will share this with acquaintances, co-workers,
the media lets on.
The first thing a soldier says when asked "What can we do to make things better for you?" is...We need your support and your prayers. Let's get the word out and lead with class and dignity, by example; and wear something red every Friday.
IF YOU AGREE -- THEN SEND THIS ON
Monday, April 24, 2006
Every Man's New Official Rules.. Listen up ladies!
always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the
rules from the male side. These are our rules!
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up,
put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us
complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the
tides. Let it be.
1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of
it that way.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't
expect us to act like soap opera guys.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of
the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one..
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want
it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to
say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We
have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like
nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an
answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared
to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster
1. You have enough clothes.
1.You have too many shoes.
1. I AM in shape. Round is a shape.
1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the
couch tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like
Sunday, April 23, 2006
Friday, April 21, 2006
traumatic event. Both parents worked. There were two dentists I went
to. Both men had there offices upstairs. One on the south side of
Verdun Avenue near 4th or 5th -- he was the impatient one. I could
never keep my head still. The other doctor -- he was patient with
children (still frightening). His practice was on the north side of
Wellington Street some where around 3rd or 4th.
Thursday, April 20, 2006
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
most advanced programs from Norton or McAfee cannot take care of this one.
It appears to affect those who were born prior to 1965.
1. Causes you to send the same e-mail twice. done that!
2. Causes you to send a blank e-mail ! that too!
3 Causes you to send e-mail to the wrong person. yep!
4. Causes you to send it back to the person who sent it to you. who
5. Causes you to forget to attach the attachment. well
6. Causes you to hit "SEND" before you've finished. oh no - not
7. Causes you to hit "DELETE" instead of "SEND." and I just hate
8. Causes you to hit "SEND" when you should "DELETE."
IT IS CALLED THE "C-NILE VIRUS."
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Tuesday, April 18, 2006
From: "john allison"
Subject: FW: Sing Along
Date: Tue, 18 Apr 2006 08:22:56 -0700
Your going love this turn up the volume and sing along
Monday, April 17, 2006
> To: VerdunConnections@groups.msn.com
> From: firstname.lastname@example.org
> Subject: Re: Fergie's Gang
> Date: Mon, 17 Apr 2006 15:39:42 -0700
> New Message on Verdun Connections
> Fergie's Gang
> Reply to Sender <@>Recommend
> Message 3 in Discussion
> From: <@><@>SecondAve
> I think it was called 'Fergie's Gang', but I only have the two brain
> cells left so don't quote me. One year a number of good Verdun hockey
> players decided to team up on Fergie's team, and they became a power
> to contend with in that hockey league.
> Second Avenue.
> View other groups in this category.
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Urban Adventurers Take Montreal's Waterways
Running the Lachine Rapids in the St. Lawrence aboard a jet boate.
IT was a spring Saturday in Montreal, and swelling the throngs along the Rue Ste.-Catherine were hipsters in low-slung designer jeans and gossamer tops, wholesome types in costumes straight out of the latest Roots catalog, fashionable families and chic older couples. French and English, Spanish and Italian filled the air. A lively group packed Le Paris, a popular bistro on Rue Ste.-Catherine with antique prints, cheek-by-jowl tables, and classic French dishes like poached salmon and grilled blood pudding.
As a chattering crowd swarmed the Contemporary Art Museum on the Place-des-Artes and the sidewalk cafes of Old Montreal, in another part of town Don Lindberg, his wife, Sue, and their kids, Brady and Ali, were donning full-body windbreakers and life preservers for a different Montreal experience — a jet boat ride into the Lachine Rapids in the St. Lawrence River.
"They call them Barney suits because they're purple," said Mr. Lindberg. "They don't keep you dry." But probably no suit would, because the jet boat hits a wall of water from 6 to 12 feet tall, as Mr. Lindberg describes it, and the waves "crash over you so that you're completely soaked."
"It was fantastic," he added.
The Lindberg family went through the rapids six times on jet boats run by Les Descentes sur le St.-Laurent on Lasalle Boulevard in southwest Montreal last May. "If we weren't flying home to San Antonio tonight," Mr. Lindberg said, "I'd do it again tomorrow."
Among the millions of travelers who visit Montreal each year, thousands are discovering that they can take a break from galleries and bistros with a taste of citified wilderness in the Lachine Rapids and the nearby Lachine Canal.
Daredevil whitewater boating and quiet canal kayaking lure many out onto the water, and the city is gaining even more fame as a major destination for bicyclists. As the Lindbergs stepped into their Barney suits, cyclists of the hard-core sort were out in force on the path bordering the canal, clad head to toe in expensive-looking biking outfits and gear, the sun glinting off the chrome of their shiny bicycles. The city and its suburbs have more than 200 miles of well-groomed cycling paths, a major reason why Bicycling magazine has twice named Montreal the No. 1 major North American city for cycling. One of the most popular routes is the one bordering the Lachine Canal.
The nine-mile canal, which runs from just west of the Old Port on the St. Lawrence and through southwestern Montreal to Lake St. Louis, opened in 1825 to take cargo ships around the rapids, which roil and churn smack-dab in the middle of the river. The name Lachine may have started out as a sneer. It is said that the 17th-century explorer, Ren챕-Robert Cavelier de La Salle, the first seigneur to hold land west of the rapids, was obsessed with finding a westward route to China, and that his repeated failed attempts led his fellow colonists to refer to his lands ironically as China, or La Chine.
The canal spurred the economic development of the Canadian West, and industry grew up along its banks. After being rendered irrelevant by the St. Lawrence Seaway, completed in 1959, the canal was closed to navigation in 1970. Refurbished, it reopened in 2002 for recreational boating. So now the St. Lawrence River, Montreal's raison d'챗tre, still runs wild through the city while the quiet Lachine Canal is filled with sailboats, canoes and other small craft.
Out-of-towners can rent small boats on the canal from companies like H2O Adventures across from Atwater Market, which has kayaks, pedal boats and five-seat electric boats that go no faster than 10 kilometers (six miles) an hour, the legal limit on the canal.
The canal slices through the city, framed by strips of parkland studded with picnic tables and rows of Lombardy poplars standing like quills. It splits off from the river where ships heading southwest from the ocean and northern Quebec came to the end of navigable waters.
At the canal's eastern end, near the first of its five sets of locks, boats put in close to a massive abandoned grain silo at the Old Port. A Montreal landmark, the Farine Five Roses sign, rises atop a flour mill. The industrial feel of this section of the canal recalls its origins.
Farther along, paddlers and sailors glide past old factories and warehouses, many now converted into lofts and co-ops. Another reminder of an earlier era are the occasional stacks of multicolored shipping containers sitting on Lachine's banks and creating checkerboard patterns against the sky.
Then there are the outskirts of the city, with fewer apartment buildings and more manicured open spaces, and at last Lake St. Louis — a wide section of the river.
The canalside path traces both banks of the canal, which are connected by bridges and locks, in some places; along other stretches, it appears on only one side. In-line skaters zoom along it, passing the joggers, and there's a separate trail reserved exclusively for walkers. The cyclists speed past in their own lane.
Though many of the avid bicyclists are Montrealers, others come from all over North America. The canal and its paths are busiest from April to October, but the most determined cyclists keep going deep into winter, cutting swaths through the snow alongside cross-country skiers.
More leisurely bike riders need not be intimidated by the Lance Armstrong wannabes hunkered down over their handlebars. Plenty of stateside visitors to Montreal rent bicycles for an afternoon of low-key riding along the canal.
A family outing along the canalside bike path, which is shared by joggers and in-line skaters.
The rider with plenty of time can also stop along the path to read signs and maps highlighting local history and landmarks like the 300-year-old Saint Gabriel House, which now holds exhibits on rural 17th-century Quebec life. Near the western entrance to the canal at Lake St. Louis is a cluster of places to park the bike and visit: the Lachine Museum, in Montreal's oldest complete house; the 17th-century Maison Leber-LeMoyne, with collections of Colonial-era artifacts and documents; the Fur Trade at Lachine National Historical Site, in an old stone warehouse with bales of pelts and other trade goods; the Lachine Canal Visitors' Center; and Ren챕-L챕vesque Park, an open-air sculpture garden.
"Lachine is where you go to escape downtown Montreal with all the high-rise hotels and office buildings," Mr. Hayes said.
"It's a very scenic, peaceful ride, and I look forward to doing it every time I come up here."
If You Go
Several companies cater to Montreal visitors who want to experience the Lachine Canal and the Lachine Rapids.
Ça Roule Montréal (27 de la Commune Est; 514-866-0633; www.caroulemontreal.com) rents bicycles, inline skates and stand-up scooters. Bike rentals are $6.50 an hour, $21.75 a day, on weekends; $6 an hour and $19 a day weekdays. (Prices here and below are in U.S. dollars, calculated at 1.19 Canadian dollars to the U.S. dollar.)
Kayaks, pedal boats and electric boats can be rented across the canal from the Atwater Market at H2O Adventures (514-842-1306; www.h2oadventures.ca). A one-person sea kayak rental is $13 the first hour, $8.70 for each hour thereafter; pedal boats are $8.70 and $7; electric boats, $30.50 and $26.
A more leisurely kind of canal boating can be had on L'Éclusier, a glass-roofed boat resembling Paris's bateau-mouche (514-846-0428; www.croisierecanaldelachine.ca/en). Two-hour guided tours, starting from Atwater Market and going to Peel Basin via the St. Gabriel Lock, are given in English and French daily June 24 to Sept. 4; on weekends and holidays May 20 through Oct. 9. The cruises are $14.50; ages 5 to 12, $8.50.
Les Descentes sur le St.-Laurent (514-767-2230, www.raftingmontreal.com) takes visitors rafting and jet-boating on the Lachine Rapids. Rafting trips are $35; ages 13 to 18, $29.60; ages 6 to 12, $20. Jet-boating costs $41.75, $33 and $24.50.
For more information on the Lachine Canal, contact the Lachine Canal National Historic Site of Canada (514-283-6054; www.pc.gc.ca).
I meant to post this just after I got it from my brother visiting Montreal, but I have been out of town quite a bit lately. Anyways, he provided me with his review of Emile Bertand's compared to the Griffintown Cafe, compared to Bingo's (which is on Verdun Ave corner of Obsorne, I think). Here it is...
"Anyway, on Wednesday I came downtown on the bike (through "the Griff") and had a chance to check out Emile B’s hot dog/spruce beer shop (both the original location at 1308 Notre Dame, which is now a fairly nice/semi-trendy boulangerie/coffee shop, and the new location, just a little further west and south on Aqueduc—which is a short, one-block street which runs north-south, perpendicular to Notre Dame. Further down Notre Dame, just a half-block past Aqueduc, there is an interesting coffee shop/snack bar called the Griffintown
Caf챕.) Anyway, the new Emile B. location is pretty much as Guy described.
There was a cop car parked out front when I drove by and a couple of Mtl. cops inside, no doubt scarfing down some steamers, fries, and biere d’epinette—which probably means that the food is fairly decent (or some aspect of the place is, although I couldn’t quite figure out what that would be). Anyway, what struck me that I didn’t like too much was the pricing (maybe the cops got complimentary
meals): five bucks for the two steamer, fries, and spruce beer (apparently all you can drink, according to Guy) trio, compared to about $3.50 (now) at Bingo’s (Pepsi instead of spruce beer), which seemed a little high to me, even given the funky setting in "the Griff". (The one steamer, fries, and spruce beer trio at Emile’s is $3.85 which is still higher than Bingo’s, although I’m not sure if the $3.85 even includes GST/PST—Bingo’s includes the GST/PST in the $3.50, approximately—never sure exactly how much it is at Bingo’s now, because around Christmas they seemed to raise it every month—I believe it was $3.45 at the beginning of January, 2006 and had just gone up to $3.25 from $3.00 in November, 2005). Anyway, I did check it out, but I didn’t go in or have anything to eat there—I think part of the charm for Les is just sentimental or nostalgic. I mean there are a lot of those types of places around (most of which charge a lot less for the "steamer" special); I guess the only competitive advantage Emile B’s has is the spruce beer (although apparently that is not that good, according to Guy, even though they have a "bottomless cup" policy, which Bingo’s doesn’t)."
Sunday, April 16, 2006
This is for those born 1920-1979!
TO ALL THE KIDS
WHO SURVIVED the
1930's 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's !!
First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant.
They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn't get tested for diabetes.
Then after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-based paints.
We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we
rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking.
As infants & children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, booster seats, seat belts or air bags.
Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always a special treat.
We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle.
We shared one soft drink with four friends,
From one bottle and...
NO ONE actually died from this.
We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank lemonade made with sugar, but we weren't overweight because .
WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING !
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on.
No one was able to reach us all day.
And we were O.K.
We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down
The hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.
We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 150 channels on cable, no video movies or DVD's, no surround-sound or CD's, no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet or chat rooms..........
WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!
We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no
Lawsuits from these accidents.
We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.
We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays,
Made up games with sticks and tennis balls and, although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes.
We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang
The bell, or just walked in and talked to them!
Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!!
The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of.
They actually sided with the law!
These generations have produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!
The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.
We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned
DEAL WITH IT ALL!!!!!!!!!
If YOU are one of them . . CONGRATULATIONS!
You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as
Kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated so much of our lives
For our own good .
And while you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave (and lucky) their parents were.
Kind of makes you want to run through the house with scissors, doesn't it?! Or the office.....
home of my grandparents within which was successfully raised 7 sons
and daughters, one of which was my dad. Great stuff.
For some strange reason I cannot post on the oldest 'Remembering
Verdun' thread. Not a problem.
Saturday, April 15, 2006
Friday, April 14, 2006
St. Jean De Dieu Hospital? Also rare pictures of trains and street
cars from many years ago.
I have a PPS attachment I could send to anyone interested and maybe
they could post them on Verdun Connections. Unfortunately I do not
have that ability with my operating system.
Thursday, April 13, 2006
Okay. I just have to forward this from my niece Connie, who is a member of VC. YUP......There is just no pleasing some women. That's my story, and I am sticking to it. Winston Allison
After 4 (or more) long months of cold and winter, we are finally coming up to summer and BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking as it's the only type of cooking a real man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved.
When a man volunteers to do the BBQ, the following chain of events are put into motion:
1) The woman buys the food.
2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man, who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
Here comes the important part:
4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with the situation.
7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces and brings them to the table.
9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
And most important of all:
10) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women....
I was contacted two weeks ago and asked to assist in marketing a reality-TV
series coming to A&E, premiering on Easter Sunday (in little over one week).
It was presented to me as the real drama of four young men navigating
through the decision of marriage or priestly life. Naturally suspicious of
another presumptive attempt to unpack Catholicism by a major secular media
provider, enhanced even more by the title "God or the Girl" -- I held out hope and
asked them to
forwarded the episodes.
Here I am after many hours of reviewing the series. speechless, overwhelmed,
moved to humility, praise and frequently even tears for what God has done
and is going to do with this series. You all know my appreciation for media,
both secular and religious. You know that as a devout and passionate Catholic
and former seminarian, as one who knows the beauty of married love, as one
who has seen the best and worst of the "Catholic institution"-that my antennae
is up pretty high
for poor programming. Without question, just past the title is the most
powerful television programming I have ever been privileged to experience. If
there has never been a place in the lives of scrupulous, devout Christians for
popular television programming, for "reality television," this series opens
This is what I write in the primer:
These young men are the real deal. They share an unmistakable love for God
and their Catholic faith. They're well balanced and share the general
experience of their culture. One of them leaves behind a high-paying job and
attends a tail-gate party to share with frat buddies his interest in priestly life.
Instead of the awkward culture clash one might expect, we're given witness
of how the faithful can authentically engage culture. Another young man has a
relationship with his girlfriend. They are an attractive couple who
represent the dreams of young, middle America. Yet they profess chastity, and agree
to put God first when it comes to vocation. The counter-cultural message is
unmistakable: attraction to the opposite sex alone is not a determinant of
one's vocation. Another young man
is clearly the attractive, All American kid whom everyone likes. He
acknowledges past sexual immorality, but evidences a contagious joy of living for
Jesus Christ in the present. Vocation is clearly for the now. We're taken
to his house, called "Fort Zion," where he and housemates enthusiastically
lead a youth group. In a particularly moving scene we see them kneeling
together before an abortion clinic and praying the rosary. Hardly the "on the
fringes" zealot one might
expect, one connects with him as a modern day Paul. His witness validates
the beauty of living for God.
I was pleasantly surprised t o see Fr. Brian Bashista in the first episode-a
mentor of one of the young men. Fr. Brian is a former fellow-seminarian
(Mount St. Mary's in Emmitsburg,Maryland), and now director of Vocations for
Arlington. He was involved with my establish ing Mount 2000 in 1995. I
contacted him and he had nothing but great things to say about the production
itself, and the experience. He was one of a handful permitted to view the final
episode. He writes:
As a participant in the A&E TV mini-series `God or the Girl' I had the
privilege of seeing all five shows several weeks ago. Immediately after the
viewing I commented to the producers that, from my perspective as a Vocation
Director, they did an incredible job of capturing the reality of vocation
discernment with all of its twists and turns, ups and downs, highlights and
Contrary to popular opinion, this series will no doubt reveal to its viewers
what many in the Church have already know for years, namely, that numerous
outgoing, affable, balanced, intelligent and attractive young men are
seriously considering a call to serve Christ and His Church as a future Roman
Catholic priest. Many of these men are, or are well on their way to become,
`highly successful' in the `eyes of the world'.but are willing to give up
everything for a life which
points to a reality `beyond this world'. Despite what their friends,
family, classmates or co-workers might think, they are willing to seriously
explore this `road less traveled'. Despite their mixed motives and normative
questions, fears and doubts, they are to be admired for their courage and faithful
witness to take note of Lord's invitation to "Come follow Me".
Here's what Harry Forbes, of the USCCB, has to say:http://www.catholic.org/ae/movies/review.php?id=19242
With a potential reach to over 88 million homes, this is going to impact
individual lives and our culture. It's going to be the kind of program that many
young men and women are going to speak of years down the road-as the
beginning of their conversion to Jesus Christ, for getting on the path to
sacramental marriage or priesthood. I'm asking you to be an instrument of this effort
by simply passing this along. Please help me in getting the Word out
(please delete any
headers so your forward is clean). This is absolutely a triumph for the
authenticity of Jesus Christ alive and present in the Catholic Church, revealed
in the most engaging way- the lives of "ordinary-yet-extraordinary" young
The showings as revealed at the site, www.GodortheGirl.com:
Easter Sunday, April 16, 9-11 p.m. - Episodes 1 and 2
Easter Monday, April 17, 9-11 p.m. - Episodes 3 and 4
Sunday, April 23, 9-10:00 p.m. -- FINALE
Park, and we lost every fun game. He would ask if you had a pair of
skates and if you did, you were on the team. Many boys ungifted as
hockey player (like myself), had a chance to play because of this
gentleman. God bless him so many years ago.
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
Monday, April 10, 2006
Mark you calendars... book your agendas... the party is ON!
We are making an effort to get everyone together one more time
to celebrate the fact that this year, most of us will turn, if haven't already turned...
What better way to celebrate than in a BAR.... CHEERS!!
DATE: Saturday, July 1st, 2006
PLACE: CHEERS Bar - 1260 Mackay
Downtown Montreal, between Ste. Catherine & Rene Levesque Blvd.
3rd floor, Sports Bar
TIME: 7:00 p.m. 'till whenever....
Please feel free to invite whomever you wish to join us and, if possible, confirm to me how many individuals will be coming!
I have sent this to the email ID's that I have; and I will post this date on our VCHS '73 & '74 sites as well.
Looking forward to seeing all of you again!
Sunday, April 9, 2006
Saturday, April 8, 2006
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA
1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges.
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
1. Big Rock between you and B.C.
2. Ottawa who?
3. Tax is 7 per cent instead of approximately 200 per cent for the
rest of the country.
4. Flames vs. Oilers.
5. Stamps vs. Eskies.
6. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
7. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be
its own country.
8. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN
1. You never run out of wheat.
2. Cruise control takes on a whole new meaning.
3. Your province is really easy to draw.
4. You never have to worry about car roll-back if you have a
5. It takes you two weeks to walk to your neighbor's house.
6. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
7. People will assume you live on a farm.
8. Buying a huge John Deere mower makes sense.
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
1. You wake up one morning to find you suddenly have beachfront
2. The only province to ever violently rebel against the federal
3. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
4. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
5. You don't need a car, just take the canoe to work.
6. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.
7. Because of your licence plate, you are still friendly even when
you cut someone off.
8. Pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
1. You live in the centre of the universe.
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
4. There's no such thing as an Ontario Separatist. Separate from
what? You are the centre of the universe.
5. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
6. Much Music's Speaker's Corner - rant and rave on national TV for
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
1. Racism is socially acceptable.
2. The only province to ever kidnap federal politicians.
3. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbor
will move out next.
4. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
5. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *#!%".
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
1. One way or another, the government gets 98 per cent of your income.
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
3. When listing the provinces, everyone forgets to mention yours.
4. The economy is based on fish, cows, and ferrying Ontario
motorists to Boston.
5. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick.
6. Everybody has a Grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
7. Just as charming as Maine, but with more unemployed fishermen.
8. You probably live in a small seaside cottage with no television.
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
2. You are the "only" reason Anne Murray makes money.
3. You can pretend you have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get
drunk and wear a kilt.
4. The economy is based on lobster and fiddle music.
5. Even though it smells like dead sea animals, Halifax is
considered Canada's most beautiful city.
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got
the big, new bridge
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
3. You were probably once an extra on "Road to Avonlea".
4. This is where all those tiny red potatoes come from.
5. The economy is based on fish, potatoes, and CBC TV shows.
6. Tourists arrive, see the "Anne of Green Gables" house, then
7. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
8. It doesn't matter to you if Quebec separates.
9. You don't share a border with the Americans, or with anyone for
10. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND
1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
2. In the rare case when someone moves to the Rock, you can make
them kiss dead cod.
3. The economy is based on fish, seafood, and fish-related products.
4. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
5. You and only you understand the meaning of Great Big Sea's lyrics.
6. The workday is about two hours long.
7. You are credited with many great inventions, like the solar-
powered flashlight and the screen door for submarines.
8. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders on your wedding